- random writing -

I think I fall for him.. But I also think I fell too early.. The moment I feel like having a crush, that's the moment I think I have a mistake. Is it too soon? Yes, it is. We just talk casually, yes it's every day but we talk less on weekends, and not even once we did deep talk. We are just an acquintance for each other. We're just happen to talk every day. That's it. So why do I fall? No reason. One is loved because one is loved, no reason is needed. I'm so used to being alone. I enjoy it. Doing anything alone, not talking about my everyday life to anyone other than myself (or to my best friend if there are some worthy stories). So when suddenly there is someone I can talk to everyday, especially when that someone is a good listener and responder, isn't it not strange at all if I feel comfortable with him? But yes, I ruin this. The moment I fell for him, I ruin this relationship, this friendship. Because I know that we are nothing. So I decided to make some bou...

13 January 2023.  He asked me out for dinner. Jujur kaget sih haha. Berhubung kita udah saling tau kalo dia terkadang suka makan dulu sama temen kantornya abis kerja dan gue kalo mau makan sama temen kantor tuh biasanya emang pas Jumat biar besoknya libur, gue kira dia nanya hari ini ada rencana makan sama temen atau ngga tuh ya karena ini hari Jumat, buat basa-basi aja gitu. Siapa sangka ternyata endingnya dia ngajak makan bareng.. But actually, gue suka cara dia yang emang terang-terangan ngajak, bukan yang kode-kodean dulu. "Kamu hari ini ada rencana makan-makan sama temen kamu?" "Ngga adaa" (awalnya reflek ngetik 'kenapa?' tapi ngga jadi karena kok jadi kayak ngode wkwk) "Ohh kirain ada hahaha" "Kalo kamu nanti makan dulu sama temen kamu?" "Enggak nih, mau gak kalo kita makan bareng?" That's it. Itu juga percakapannya kira-kira 3 jam sebelum jam pulang. But anyway, pas dia nanya gitu, gue sempet salting sih HEHEHE Berhub...

So.. there is a man, I knew him through online dating apps. (Shout out to my friend yang udah nyuruh gue buat install, padahal gue ngga tertarik dan lebih ke takut sih #trustissue HAHA) Baru kenal belum ada seminggu. Dari awal kenal, ya sebatas basa-basi saling lempar pertanyaan buat tau basic information, klasik kalo baru kenalan sama orang lah. Tapi kalo boleh jujur mah, orangnya emang asik, karena ngerespon chat gue with the same excitement level gitu loh, ngga yang ngerespon iya iya doang gituu. Ya walau maaf ya cerita gue kayaknya selalu ada dan panjang banget kalo udah cerita HEHE. Dari perkenalan situ, kita jadi tau kalo kita tuh sebenernya kerja di arah kereta yang sama, tapi dia lebih deket soalnya dia turun di stasiun Sudirman, sedangkan gue di Tebet. Kalo stasiun berangkat sih bisa sama; kalo dia selalu dari Rawabuntu, kalo gue bisa Serpong/Rawabuntu tergantung kondisi, tapi stasiun tempat kita turun kalo pulang tuh sama-sama di Rawabuntu. Jam kita berangkat dan pulang tapin...